Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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