Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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