I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
People with herpes should wear stickers.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
