I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
