put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
