you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
