soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
