I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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