My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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