I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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