Who did Billy Mays play for?
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
