is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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