when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
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