Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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