you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
