The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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