I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Randomize
