I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize