carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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