we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
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