So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize