you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
