There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
operation have a gay friend backfired
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize