Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Randomize
