its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
