Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
she looked like the before picture.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize