he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
