I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
