it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
tell me about the fingering
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
