So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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