I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
