I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize