I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
