I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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