i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
