dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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