Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
