I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Where is the hickey?
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
