You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Randomize
