we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
