I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Randomize