hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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