Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
