Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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