North Korea, Best Korea!
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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