weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Randomize
