Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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