the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
