Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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