we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I pour the whiskey from now on
Randomize
