she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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